a soothed bruise

is there a metaphor in bruising, in making a salve - with petals gathered, oils infused and wax rendered - applied tenderly to skin bruised, that might help me learn about rupture and repair, that might soothe towards healing an old heart wound?

is there a connection i might weave that tracks my experience - in path of weft, through time of warp - of hurt and care, pattern and repetition, change and growth?

i have danced in the meadows i gathered the daisy petals in, and there are layered memories stitched into the split-stem-eyelets of the flower-chains i've threaded and worn, gifted and torn.

i have lit smokers with prayer, tended hive bodies through many seasons, rendered wax to share and use.

i think it's not a metaphor i need. it's not words. it's practice. it's living the healing, being present, turning towards tension, listening for what i feel, and staying here, in my body. it's asking for help. offering connection. naming capacity. sharing my experience. being comfortable with my tears: those that well up when i think of loss, past and future, and those that are a guide for me here and now, for what i need in this present.

i practice: feel into the places i hurt, process the layers, shed the fear, remember i am not alone, work towards sharing that feeling with the people i'm in relationship with. make salve, apply salve, share salve. connective, grounding, moving together - bees, plants, kindred - through the wheel of the year.

recipe: daisy beeswax salve, for bruises and aches.

1) gather 2/3 jar of lawn/english daisies, picked in abundance
2) submerge fully with olive oil, filling jar
3) leave in a cool dark place for 1 month; if you didn't dry the daisies then allow to breathe (ie. use a cheesecloth cover)
4) strain oils, compost spent daisies, weigh oil (ie. 6oz)
5) melt 1/6th of that weight in wax (ie. 1oz)
6) mix in oil until uniform
7) test by placing a small portion in a spoon in the freezer until solid
8) adjust as you like if the consistency is off for you
9) pour out into vessels
10) allow to cool fully
11) close with lid, label, share, use

note: lawn daisies and arnica are both in the aster family - they are stars, they heal bruises. lawn daisies grow plentifully amongst park grasses in the city i live in. arnica is not abundant in this place, and is not a plant i have learned to grow. i've applied arnica to every serious bruise i've ever gotten, a household and familial go to i inherited. this season i'm trying daisy. a small change. a practice. felt care. joy.